Friday 18 February 2011

Trial By Algorithm

Mutatis Mutandis can now be found - here.

'After reviewing our records, we've determined that your AdSense account
poses a risk of generating invalid activity.'


Blegh. Not the best email to wake up to. Apparently my blogs have been generating illegal ad revenue, despite never encouraging or soliciting people to click adverts in any way, so my adsense account has been disabled and the meagre revenue I'd been trying for the last year to build to the point where they actually pay out has been wiped. Which sucks.

Its also strange, in that I got nerd rage when they changed my email address, but now that they've nicked £20 off me I couldn't care less. I'm just going to take my ball and go to wordpress which, while not paying ad revenue either, doesn't make you feel like a criminal while not doing it.

It also has the added benefit of not looking and functioning like a pile of crap.

Sorry for the inconvenience of this. I hope I'll see you over there.

Linky

Tuesday 15 February 2011

Final Poll Results and New Poll

The final results are in. Thanks to everyone who voted.


Your favourite TF
Gender: 12 (23%)
Animal: 6 (11%)
Inanimate: 49 (94%)
Other: 4 (7%)

A new poll is also up.  Would people prefer it if I spit the blog into seperate blogs focusing on a particular type of transformation i.e. a blog for inanimate TF and a blog for animal TF?

Miss Dee Rection

This bodysuit is amazing. Nobody would ever guess that inside this flexible body is an overweight 50-year old man.
After my arthritis got so bad that I had to start using this suit full time, the hardest part was having to relearn all my old tricks. Guys weren't intimidated by this body anymore but they easily underestimated me. Even after I hustled them they never realised it, or if they did they never seemed to mind.
Having their eyes on me and not the game works great too, and II'm always finding new ways to draw their gaze. This is one of my favourites. Judging by the cue stick in the front of my opponent's trousers I think it's working.

Monday 14 February 2011

Bra Hero


Bra: Ungh... babe...this is...amazing but... I think you made me too small...I can't contain you...it feels like I'm going to explode...
Mandy: Shush! Bra's are supposed to be supportive, not complain all the time!
Bra: But...it...hurts...
Mandy: Great, now you made me break my multiplier! I'm not turning you back for atleast another song.
*volume up*
Bra: Nghh...

Sunday 13 February 2011

Grrrrr! Ramblerambleramble

Warning! Angry rant follows...


The Bachelor Party

"Guys, I said no strippers," Jeff laughed as his friends tied him to the table. "If Mary found out she'd..."
His voice and his laughter trailed off as his best man brought into a room not a stripper, but a can of pink spray paint. As they coated his body with it, he felt his skin thicken into gaudy, pink plastic and his flesh melt away. In no time at all, he had become a love doll tied to the table in the back room of some seedy club.

 

It is a bachelor party, he reasoned, as his drunken friends shoved a funnel into his puckered mouth and began to drag a keg of beer over. This sort of stuff is supposed to happen.
The beer began to flow into the funnel; the room swam around his head as his body swelled with alcohol.
I just hope one of them is sober enough in the morning to remember to change me back.

Friday 11 February 2011

Morning After

You're finally awake! Quite a party last night, huh? You're the last to leave.
The costume? Well after I caught you boning my girlfriend in my bed I dumped her and you were so drunk you fell asleep. So I upgraded you. You're her replacement.
Did I say you were the last to leave? Silly me. The suit restricts your movements the closer you get to the door. Take one step outside and it renders you totally immobile.
Anyway I've got some spare organs left over from your upgrade. Be a good gynoid and flush those for me? Thanks. After that there's some dishes that need cleaning. And after that I think I'll take your new chassis out for a test drive.

Tuesday 8 February 2011

Lazy Unseasonal Transformation Happy Fun Time!

I have to say that I'm being royally trounced in terms of both quality and reliability of content by the amazing writer of TF Captions, not to mention the excellent user-submitted captions over on Purse Boy. Yet I cant say I don't enjoy them massively, and I'll take inspiration/steal ideas wherever I can.

This week has been hectic, so here is another story that I'm repossessing from my distant past. This is starting to feel like graverobbing myself. I hope that by friday my mojo will be back and I'll be able to write something new, if not necesarilly original.

Going Cold Turkey

As a Witch, Wanda was quite capable of brewing glory, bottling fame, and even putting a stopper in death. But she couldn't, for the life of her, cook Christmas dinner for friends without cremating and mutilating half of a farm. She glared in frustration at the assemblage of burnt, undercooked, and/or oddly shaped dishes laid out on the table before her and knew, with her guests arriving at any minute, she was going to have to play her ace in the hole.

After last year's Christmas dinner disaster, she'd taken time out to master a spell that was capable of making a feast out of anything. Closing her eyes, she sank into a deep, spellcasting trance.

Girly Salads

Today's post features a caption kindly donated by Gugubu, as I'm a too tired to throw anything together in even a slop bucket way

Sunday 6 February 2011

In the doghouse


It doesn't matter how much you beg, George, no means no. You're not sleeping on the bed tonight, or ever again for that matter. It was a nasty trick you pulled using my spell book to swap bodies with the dog without telling me. How did you think I would feel when I found out the man I just had amazing sex with used to be an animal. Did you think I'd laugh?

But you didn't expect that Lucky would make a better husband than you ever were. He's so doting and obediant, and he's even starting to learn a few words. In the bedroom he's loving and caring, not to mention energetic.

And since you can't speak the reversal spell with your dog mouth, that's the way life is going to stay. So be a good boy and go to your kennel. It sounds like Lucky is back from his walk, and I think he's about to get "lucky".

"There's something you should know about me"

This isn't a post as such, but I wanted to try uploading a video to youtube as I'm considering having a go at video editing, like TG tales. Alas due to a content claim, embedding it in the blog was fail, and it'll probably get removed shortly.
Either way, here's the clip from the film Inception. If you haven't seen it is amazing, and features a brief TG halfway through where an identity forger disguises himself as dream woman within a dream within a dream.

Inception Clip

Friday 4 February 2011

The Second Rule of Witch Club...

Even as a witch with incredible powers, my sister was always a coward. She wanted to break up with her boyfriend but she didn't have the guts to do it. So she bodyswapped us and told me if I didn't break up with him for her she'd never turn us back. Then she morphed herself into a dress so that she could keep an eye on us.

Waiting at the bar for him to arrive, I tugged awkwardly at the purple dress she had become, feeling massively exposed as I smoothed the tight fabric over my butt. I was started to wish I'd figured out how to put on a bra before coming here. Then I saw him. He was hot. Super hot. As he eyes ran up and down my body in hunger, I knew then that I wanted this body. All it took were a few, simple words whispered into his ear.

"I'm a witch."

The first rule of witch club: You do not talk about witch club. To reveal your powers to a mortal is to forfeight them forever. The entire bar turned as my dress screamed in pain and anger, as its magical powers were stolen from it. It was still cursing me as I left the bar draped over its boyfriend's arm. In all fairness, I had done what she asked; he was no longer her boyfriend. He was mine.

She didn't last long. That night he ripped her to shreds getting to my body. Only then did she finally fall silent.

Fembrace the Future

Figure 4.3
Fembrace
 
Invented by BodySlim in 2015, the Fembrace bodystocking was one of the earliest examples of today's modern bodysuit. While hardly revolutionary in any particular area, the Fembrace effectively combined full-body application of flesh-like padding and corset-like constriction to contour the form of its wearer, and at a reasonable price. Initially aimed at women, the Fembrace quickly gained notoriety for its remarkable ability to stretch and squeeze even male bodies into its svelt, feminine template (Fig 4.3). A number of high profile court cases filed by individuals tricked by males wearing the garments helped to boost its infamy and sales.



Fig4.4
The Fembrace II, released in 2018 after years of secretive development, upgraded the original with a seamless design and flesh-coloured outer layer to more accurately mimic human skin (Fig4.4). The suits also contained an experimental voice modulator, and a deep-penetrating ultrasonic feature that semi-liquidated adipose tissue, allowing fat to be permanently redistributed around the body, which was discontinued after a series of health scares.

Though lacking nervous system integration, extradimensional matter displacement, or even a facial covering, the Fembrace was nevertheless the progenitor of all modern bodysuits. Intact originals are a collectors item and have been sold at auction for up to 1,500,000 Credits.

Thursday 3 February 2011

PSA

Thanks to Vince Ueberroth for being my first follower. The vote of confidence is much appreciated.

Call me when the swelling goes down

The Doctor: What is the meaning of this? I did not give you permission to tamper with my programming! Just because the three of us are flying reconnaissance alone for three weeks is no excuse to swap my code with that of Vulcan love slave, volume two!.

Tom Paris: Great. He still sounds like the Doc. Can't you do anything about the voice?

Ensign Kim: Uhh, no. But I think I can adjust his behavioural subruitines. *beep*

The Doctor: *kneels* Please state the nature of the sexual emergency.

Wednesday 2 February 2011

Midas Touch



Braternity



Leonardo Dicapritated

Sorry for the zero caps yesterday; I've been super busy/asleep. To half-arsedly compensate, here are some captions that I threw together three years ago for Yahoo Groups.

They were lazy captions then, and they're doubly lazy captions now.